By: Kristy Kemp
Something I was told a lot when my son was a baby was to just get a babysitter and live it up, that my me time was important, and leaving him for a few hours won't cause any harm. While I agree with that to a point I also think that no one should feel obligated to get a babysitter if they don't want to. I have heard from a ton of moms that a babysitter (other than a family member) was not an option for them. Now I'm not saying that parents who do get babysitters are wrong, but I did want to share why getting a babysitter, for some parents, is out of the question. People should respect that choice instead of trying to pressure them into getting one when they aren't feeling it.
1.) Let's start with the most obvious reason. They are expensive as hell! By the time I get done paying the sitter and my entertainment for the night I will be well over my budget for the month! In this day and age unless you have older siblings or family around to help, the cost of a babysitter is pretty steep. Saving my bank account from an overdraft is why I won't just get a babysitter.
2.) Have you seen the news? I know that not all sitters and nannies abuse children, but I would definitely need to fully trust the person I will be leaving my baby with and I do not have anyone in my life that I trust enough to leave my baby with. Even people that you fully trust can do something to break that. Call me paranoid, call me a helicopter mom, and tell me to keep my kid in bubble wrap, I don't care. My baby's safety and care will always be my number one priority so that is why I won't just get a babysitter.
3.) My baby needs me 24/7 right now and can only be comforted by me. I would not have one bit of fun even if I did go out because I would be stressing and worried about my baby being miserable the whole time. The thought of my baby scared and confused because I'm not there is why I won't just get a babysitter.
4.) I breastfeed on demand and my baby refuses to drink out of a bottle. So there are also physical needs that need to be met that could not be met by a babysitter. I'm my baby's only food source it's my responsibility to be there for him as soon as he wants to nurse and no I can't just let him nurse extra long and leave and hope that he won't want to again for a few hours. I would not be able to enjoy myself and relax knowing that I might be called any second to get my butt home to feed him which is why I won't just get a babysitter.
5.) To be perfectly honest, at this moment and time, going out just doesn't appeal me. Any free time I get these days I like to spend sleeping or even a nice hot relaxing bath would be a treat. So not to be rude, but even if I did get a sitter I wouldn't want to spend that time at a bar or an overpriced movie, which is why I will not just get a babysitter.
6.) My baby is so little and dependent on me and as emotionally draining as it may be and call me selfish , but I want to be the one that cares for him. I just don't want to give someone else the honor to step in for me. I know all of his cues, I know when he is gassy and needs to be burped, I know that looking at the ceiling fan spinning can calm him down, and I know his favorite way to be held. It took me months to learn all that I know so how would a babysitter know that has never even met him until the night of?
You can think these reasons are silly I don't mind, but they aren't silly to me, and those reasons are why I have never just "got a babysitter" for my now five year old son.